4 Ways Women Can Boost Self-Confidence During Difficult Change

Have you ever noticed that whenever we are about to launch into something new our old and faithful insecurities spike up out of nowhere?  Maybe it’s time for you to leave your job after five years and dusting off that outdated resume has got your hands trembling.  Or perhaps you’ve finally met that dream guy but now “feel fat” for the first time in years.  For me, my business has launched and taken off, which only invites new challenges and requires new skills to get better at – both being uncomfortably unfamiliar territory to walk into and conquer.

I believe that if we choose to be an evolving, growing individual we will constantly be faced with confidence issues.  Here are some tangible ways to boost your self-esteem and get you through this current transition.

1) Ask For Help.  It is normal to not have all your ducks lined up while you go through change.  If you have a full-time job and are hunting for a new one ’til bedtime, perhaps your partner needs to be specifically asked to spearhead dinnertime.  Or if you just had a baby and your dirty laundry pile has hit the ceiling, bringing in the MIL can be totally worth it, but she may not feel comfortable jumping right into your hamper without an initial request.

Asking for help doesn’t mean you can’t do it all – it means it would be easier not to do it all and that you have a voice and the communication skills to express your needs and make your life better and more intentional with time management and purpose.

2) Re-Select Your Friends. Ok, I’m not asking you to dump your friends.  But, we all know that some friends are more supportive than others during stressful transition or crisis (I know you’re all thinking of that one friend right now…).  Communicate with them why you may not have as much time for them as usual during this season but reassure them you love them nonetheless.  Then, reach out to your friends who are helpful and supportive and specify exactly what you need and for how long.  One friend looking into a career shift once asked me “I would love if you could help me with 3 community connections that could lead to some job opportunities in non-profit program development.”

Why, yes, I can absolutely do that for you.

3) Get Enough Sleep.  I don’t know what your “number” is.  Mine is 8.  And I know exactly what my day will look like when I get 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, etc.  When we enter into new transitions our adrenal glands spike and emotions are a roller coaster.  Sleep allows us to reset our hormones and prepare us for a more energetically balanced day.  Furthermore, when we feel extremely down, sad, excited, frantic or (fill in emotion here) we are actually exerting more energy, which means we need more sleep!  Let’s make sleep our friend.

4) Pay a Professional for Services.  “Oh, here’s the plug for therapy!” you say!  Well, of course, but I’m more plugging the idea and belief that your growth and change is of high value and, therefore, costs money.  For post-baby weight loss, it could be a physical trainer or for a promotion it could be a mentorship program.  And, of course, therapy goes without saying for anyone needing emotional support during any transition.  I’ve often heard people say “well, I can just go to my friends for help”.  Um, let’s go back to #2 – who are these friends, what are their skill sets and for how long can they help you until they are burnt out?!

I have a friend who launched into a business venture and invested in personal therapy, professional coaching/consultation, a mentor and a fee-based networking support group.  It seems like a lot of money but he is now one of the most successful businessmen I have ever met and he’s pretty darn happy and satisfied with his life in general.  If you value your emotional well-being at a high price, it pays off in the end and leaves you happier, healthier and ultimately richer in so many ways.