Feeling Better About Ourselves

Did you know that 6 out of 7 women anonymously report a significant sense of dissatisfaction in at least one area of their life?  However, when asked to publicly report ownership of said dissatisfaction, less than half are inclined to share these honest feelings.

Why is that?

I believe, as women, that many of us struggle with self-esteem, fear and empowerment issues and that these issues go hand-in-hand with the belief and trust in ourselves to proactively move toward change and growth.  When we make the choice to tackle and conquer our insecurities and fears, we grow closer to becoming and mirroring who we really to be.

“Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face.  Fear of not being liked.  Fear of making the wrong choice.  Fear of drawing negative attention.  Fear of overreaching.  Fear of being judged.  Fear of failure.  And the holy trinity of fear: the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter”  – Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook

What Therapy Addresses

Whether you are single or married, four-years-old or 82, I believe individual therapy can help equip you to have healthier relationships, and a more fulfilling career and work/life balance.  When we feel bad about ourselves and/or cannot propel ourselves into positive change, some other connecting topics come up that I address and can help with:

  • Depression
  • Anxiety
  • Grief recovery
  • Eating disorders
  • Financial struggle
  • Poor coping skills
  • Domestic violence/trauma
  • Past child abuse
  • Crisis of faith/spiritual formation

Children and Self-Esteem

Often, when I sit with a client and ask how they learned the message that they weren’t good enough, I typically hear something like, “well, when I was 8-years-old, my family…”.  Children and teens are highly impacted by family circumstance and home/school environments in ways that can affect them for a lifetime.  I wish I haven’t met with dozens of 6 and 10 year-olds who tell me they have been called “fat” at school, but I have.

I love working with children and inviting them into their own safe place to express what they are thinking and feeling.   To me, this is the opportunity to smash insecurity and fear of failure at its root and enable that child to thrive much later in life.  My time with children takes place through play, rather than words.  I utilize sand, art, dolls, games and books to invite children to explore and reconcile their hurts, curiosity and worries in a comfortable and age-appropriate way.  Adolescents usually enjoy a combination of traditional talk therapy and tactile play, depending on their developmental stage.  When children are hurting or feeling bad about themselves, a variety of issues can be addressed and worked through:

  • Behavioral issues
  • Child abuse/neglect
  • Witnessing domestic violence
  • Recovering from divorce
  • Peer relationships
  • Self harming
  • Eating disorders

Leaving a Bad Relationship

Do you feel like you are walking on eggshells with your partner?  Has your self-esteem plummeted since the “honeymoon” stage of your relationship ended?  I ask these questions because people often do not realize when they are being abused by their partner.   Maybe you just feel like your partner is “going through a rough time” and will change when circumstances change.   These are some common red flags for abuse:

  • Name calling
  • Not being allowed to have friends
  • Not having a career or work history
  • Having sex when you don’t really want it
  • Your partner threatening to hurt themselves if you leave

Every year, 1.8 million people are victimized by their partner in the U.S., yet we do not often hear about these cases.  Unfortunately, only a small fraction of these seek the help that they need.  Let me walk alongside you on the path toward physical and emotional safety and experiencing healthy relationships.  I specialize in safety planning, crisis intervention and trauma recovery.  If you have left your abuser and been awarded Victims of Crime Assistance, I offer a billing plan to a limited number of clients.

If you are experiencing any of these concerns, contact me, I can help.

Phone: (949) 870-8098